


world i can call mine

by frecklebombfic (frecklebomb), savedby



Series: Now and Forever [1]
Category: Hockey RPF
Genre: Audio Format: M4B, Audio Format: MP3, Audio Format: Streaming, Author Commentary, Community: pod_together, Getting Together, Multi, Podfic, Podfic & Podficced Works, Podfic Length: 30-45 Minutes, Polyamory, Polyamory Negotiations
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-27
Updated: 2017-08-27
Packaged: 2018-12-15 07:34:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,383
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11801418
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/frecklebomb/pseuds/frecklebombfic, https://archiveofourown.org/users/savedby/pseuds/savedby
Summary: Moving out to his own place was supposed to give Zach a little respite from a house with four brothers. Unsurprisingly, it doesn’t work out like that. It turns out that Zach is apparently the only hockey player north of the border who knows how to cook or do his own laundry.It’s not all that bad, granted. They can clean, with some supervision. For example, Auston is very particular about always sweeping and mopping up the floors, and Mitch has a fantastic talent for folding laundry into animal shapes.Actually, most nights it’s just Auston and Mitch that come over, help with dishes and laundry and whatever needs doing. In hindsight, that should have been some sort of clue.





	1. Podfic

**Author's Note:**

> \- many thank yous to the pod_together mods, and to Paraka for hosting!  
> \- chapter 1 of this is just the podfic page, and chapter 2 is just the text.  
> \- for the podfic chapter on mobile, please scroll to the side to get to the links.  
> \- author and podficcer have recorded a freetalk together about the collaboration, and two versions of the podfic are available to listen to: with or without the freetalk at the end (transcript of freetalk available for accessibility)  
> \- enjoy!

Cover design by frecklebombfic  
Image by [Quin Stevenson](https://unsplash.com/@qstevenson?photo=3oyeaivM_fE)

| 

### Podfic

###### Streaming: podfic only

(Use mp3 link for mobile streaming)

###### Downloads: podfic only

Duration: 40:11 

  * [MP3](http://pod-together.parakaproductions.com/2017/%5bHockey%20RPF%5d%20world%20i%20can%20call%20mine%20-%20podfic%20only.mp3)  |  **Size:** 40.1 MB
  * [M4B](https://t.co/KBRWFpijvR?amp=1)  |  **Size:** 56.6 MB
(Right click and save-as to download) 
  
  
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| 

### Podfic & creator's freetalk

###### Streaming: podfic & freetalk

(Use mp3 link for mobile streaming)

###### Downloads: podfic & freetalk

Duration: 40:11 podfic + 30:35 freetalk (total 1:10:47)

  * [MP3](http://pod-together.parakaproductions.com/2017/%5bHockey%20RPF%5d%20world%20i%20can%20call%20mine%20-%20with%20freetalk.mp3)  |  **Size:** 73.4 MB
  * [M4B](https://t.co/AVyn5BbYrS?amp=1)  |  **Size:** 99.8 MB
Freetalk transcript available [here](https://docs.google.com/document/d/1JXAMRZWgWp6NCDisghZ9uHy51QdUHyBnV3P_l6lKjYo/edit?usp=drivesdk) 
  
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**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Podfic music used is [Our Way To Fall](https://youtu.be/bOylOEGY9M4) by Yo La Tengo (youtube link) 
> 
> Polyamory terms and end notes at the [end of the next chapter](http://archiveofourown.org/chapters/26631201#chapter_2_endnotes)


	2. Text

 

 

 

“Okay, sit your asses down, we’re playing ‘Never have I ever!’” Mitch yells out, waving around his empty glass. Apparently, he gets more hyperactive when he’s drunk, though that could also be the Red Bulls’ that Zach’s seen him downing.

 

No one seems inclined to protest the party game, except for William, who calls Mitch’s idea dumb and childish. But then again, he calls all of his ideas that. Zach suspects that it’s a habit by now.

 

They’re all gathered at Matt Martin’s rented apartment, allegedly to get the rookies to bond and get into the team spirit, but actually more as an excuse to get them all comfortably and safely tanked, so they won’t be tempted to do it on their own.

 

Zach doesn’t mind. He’s three beers in and feeling it, and everyone else is in a similar state, otherwise they’d never have agreed to what Mitch is proposing. But as it is, they settle down in a circle. Zach sits next to Auston, who leans into his shoulder.

 

“I’ll start,” William announces, before Mitch can open his mouth again. He pouts a little, but doesn’t interrupt. “I’ve never made out with Connor McDavid.”

 

Mitch takes an enthusiastic gulp of his drink, as expected. Less expected is Auston, taking a sip while furiously blushing, muttering something about Team North America. And then there’s Brownie, who drinks with the nonchalant air of someone who definitely has something to hide.

 

It goes on in much the same vein, from eating on the toilet, which is gross, to peeing in the shower, which Zach does drink to. 

 

Zach’s mind wanders, to college parties and half-forgotten nights spent just like this. There are so many strange things he’s learned about strangers and just forgotten by the next morning. He feels suddenly inexplicably old, watching Kappy flush red as he mumbles his question.

 

“I’ve never had a threesome,” Kappy says, while William giggles nervously, and Zach takes an absent-minded sip.

 

Silence. 

 

Zach looks around, confused. Everyone is staring at him, slack jawed.

 

“What?” he asks.

 

“Our Zach’s got moves!” William yells out and then everyone else starts talking at the same time, as Zach looks on. 

 

Eventually, Matt leans forward, cutting into the chatter. “Now, this is a story I’d like to hear,” he says, and because you just don’t argue with Matt Martin when he’s giving you his full attention, Zach talks.

 

“There were these two girls in college-” he starts.

 

“Two girls,” Kappy whispers, awed, and Willy shushes him impatiently. Zach clears his throat.

 

“We were in a hierarchical triad,” he says, then looks up to see puzzled faces and elaborates, “I was their secondary partner. Mostly for sex, because that’s what they wanted, but we went on a few dates too.” 

 

“Do you still see them?” Auston’s voice cuts through the ensuing silence. He’s got a strange expression on his face that Zach can’t quite decipher.

 

“Not really,” Zach says. “This was a while ago. We’re still friends though.”

 

It’s true. Melanie called him over skype to congratulate him on his debut, and they’d just talked hockey for a few hours, while Susan knitted and listened to them ramble with a long suffering expression. It was almost like their junior year again, except now they lived in Ohio and he had a career in the NHL.

 

They press him for details, but it’s as far as he’ll go. 

 

“I’m not coaching you through a threesome,” Zach has to repeat a few times, “just Google it, please.”

 

Eventually, they relent, and move to other topics, and Zach breathes a sigh of relief. He looks at Auston, carefully, finds him staring at thin air still with that weird expression on his face. He turns to Mitch, to find out what’s going on with Auston, but Mitch is gone.

 

He comes back twenty minutes later, claims he’s been in the bathroom, and doesn’t look at Zach once.

 

The next day, he wakes up hungover to Auston pounding on his door, because he’s out of almond milk. Zach briefly considers mentioning the weirdness from last night, but Auston seems to be normal, and he’s more than glad to let it go.

  
  


*

  
  


“Is it ready now?” Mitch asks, leaning into Zach’s personal space.

 

Zach automatically whacks his hand away from the pots with his spatula. “No,” he says, “just like it hasn’t been ready the last five times that you asked.”

 

“But Zaach! I’m hungry,” Mitch says, sticking his hands behind his back and leaning his chin on Zach’s shoulder to look at the pots longingly. “It’s taking so long.”

 

“Why didn’t you eat at home if you’re so hungry?” Zach asks, a little curious. Mitch’s family home isn’t that far from Zach’s apartment, but he invites himself to dinner really often.

 

Mitch ignores Zach’s statement, rocking on his heels to keep his chin on Zach’s shoulder as he moves around.

 

“It’s taking so long that Auston’s already expired from hunger,” he says.

 

Auston looks up from where he tapping something on his phone. “What?”

 

“He’s already starting to smell,” Mitch says, mournfully.

 

“Hey!” 

 

Zach stifles his laughter at the argument that ensues, and carefully shakes off Mitch to move the pots off the stove. 

 

“It’s ready,” Zach pronounces, cutting through the noise. Mitch cheers.

 

“I set the table,” Auston says, almost timidly, and Zach turns around to stare at him. 

 

“Oh,” he says, “thanks, Auston.”

 

His small dining table is rarely used, because Zach prefers to eat in the breakfast nook, where the view of Toronto is nicer. But, the table is now barely recognizable. All of Zach’s plates are really simple, utilitarian, but in the dim candlelight they’re gleaming.

 

“The candles are a nice touch,” Zach says.

 

“I have too many, so,” Auston shrugs, kind of awkwardly. 

 

“He really does,” Mitch breaks in, “do you know how long he takes picking out things at Yankee Candle?”

 

“They all smell different!” Auston hisses at him.

 

Zach touches the table with no small amount of wonder. “I didn’t even know I had a tablecloth.”

 

“You don’t!” Mitch says, cheerfully. “I took a bed sheet out of your cupboard.”

 

Zach squints at it. In hindsight, it does look familiar. “It actually looks really good, thanks Marns.”

 

Mitch beams.

 

Zach directs them to sit. He doesn’t really trust them with hot pans. They’re both first round picks, but they don’t test hot pan handling at the combine.

 

“Did Willie say why he and Kappy couldn’t make it?” Zach asks, a couple of minutes later, after they’ve all filled their plates.

 

Auston and Mitch exchange a glance that Zach can’t read.

 

“Uhhh,” Auston starts, “they had...a thing.”

 

Zach frowns. “A thing?” he asks. “That’s so weird. I talked to Willie in practice and he seemed pretty enthusiastic about coming.”

 

“Something came up,” Mitch says, hurriedly.

 

“What?”

 

“Kappy got explosive diarrhea and Willie’s being a good boyfriend, you know, wiping his ass, keeping him hydrated.”

 

“That’s...nice of him,” Zach says, bewildered. Mitch nods, a little desperately. Auston’s abandoned all pretense of following the conversation and is stuffing his face with the salad.

 

Zach takes a swing of his beer in the awkward silence. Seeing the set table and the candles gave him a weird impulse to offer wine, but he’s not sure he has any or if his guests even like it. So Mitch is drinking water, and Auston’s got a beer too, because his apartment is the same building as Zach’s.

 

“Oh, Auston,” Zach says, suddenly remembering “do you want me to pack some of leftovers for your dad? I feel bad that we just left him alone.”

 

Auston blinks at him for a moment too long and Zach starts wondering if he’s done something wrong. But then, Auston smiles. It’s one of his rare smiles that seem almost startled out of him in their sweetness. It lights up his whole face.

 

“He’d like that,” Auston says, quietly, “thank you.”

 

Zach nods, momentarily at a loss, and looks down at his food, even though his gaze keeps wanting to stray up again.

 

“Cute,” Mitch mutters under his breath next to him, and Zach finds himself agreeing.

  
  


*

  
  


Zach stops Willie at practice the next morning.

 

“Hey, is Kappy okay?” Zach asks, feeling a little awkward. Willie frowns.

 

“Yes? Is there a reason he shouldn’t be?” Willie says, quizzically. 

 

“I just thought-” Zach starts, “Marns says Kappy was...ill. And that that’s why you couldn’t make it to dinner.”

 

“Oh, right,” Willie says, eyes widening. “Wait, what? What did he say was wrong?”

 

Zach lowers his voice. “Uh...diarrhea.”

 

“Oh, that little fucker,” Willie says, rolling his eyes. “You know what? They swore me to secrecy, but I’ll just tell you anyway.”

 

“Tell me what?”

 

“They paid us to go out for dinner last night.”

 

Zach frowns. “Why would they do that?”

 

“Well, they probably wanted to be with you alone.”

 

“What? Why?” 

 

Willie shakes his head. “Oh, no. No way. I’m not getting in the middle of this. You figure it out on your own, I’m not saying anything else.”

 

“Okay,” Zach says, slowly. “Thanks for telling me. And I hope you know that you and Kappy are welcome for dinner any time.”

 

Willie blinks at him. “You’re honestly such a sweetheart,” he says finally and Zach’s cheeks burn. “I’ll keep that in mind. Sorry for dropping out on you yesterday.”

 

“It’s okay.”

 

“Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to go kill Marns.”

  
  


*

 

Moving out to his own place was supposed to give Zach a little respite from a house with four brothers. Unsurprisingly, it doesn’t work out like that.

 

It turns out that Zach is apparently the only hockey player north of the border who knows how to cook or do his own laundry. 

 

Or so it seems, because as soon as practice ends, he gets swarmed with an unending horde of Leafs rookies that don’t know how to properly do their household chores.

 

Most of them he delegates to their parents and some he refuses to even answer (for example, he has absolutely no intention of explaining how to clean cum encrusted underwear), but at the end of the day he usually still ends up with two or three people over for dinner.

 

It’s not all that bad, granted. They can clean, with some supervision. Auston is very particular about always sweeping and mopping up the floors, and Mitch has a fantastic talent for folding laundry into animal shapes.

 

Actually, most nights it’s just Auston and Mitch that come over, help with dishes and laundry and whatever needs doing. It’s nice having them around, bickering in his kitchen and napping on his sofa, and sometimes, memorably, on his lap. 

 

His mind strays sometimes to his revelation about his college relationship, and how both Mitch and Auston had reacted to it. There was something there, but it could have just been surprise. 

 

They haven’t mentioned it since, unlike the rest of their teammates who mention it frequently, always perfectly timed to make Zach blush. Apparently, Zach and his threesomes are the most interesting gossip that’s entered the NHL grapevine from Toronto since Bozie and Kessel had passionately made out on the front lawn of some house party in Vancouver. 

 

Dylan Larkin tried to chirp him about it the other day at the faceoff. Or at least that’s what Zach thinks he was trying to do.

 

“I sure don’t remember having threesomes at Michigan State,” he’d said.

 

Zach had absentmindedly muttered, “Your loss,” and actually won the puck.

  
  


*

  
  


The apartment Zach is renting came mostly furnished, including a huge California King bed that takes up most of the bedroom. The bed frame was sturdy, and it vaguely matched the rest of the furniture, which was good enough for him. There was only one problem - the mattress. It was completely ruined. Zach didn’t really want to know what ruined it as badly as it did, but having to sleep on the sofa was starting to hurt. Literally.

 

You’d think that a big city like Toronto would have a decent number of mattress stores. Turns out, it doesn’t, especially downtown where Zach lives. He doesn’t really have a lot of time to browse stores, with the grind of the season and all. 

 

He ends up ordering one online on the laptop he borrowed from Mitch, while fighting to stay awake during a plane ride and trying not to look at Mitch’s search results. Someone really needed to show him how to use private browsing to look at porn.

 

(Mitch watched a lot of threesome porn, Zach couldn’t help but notice.)

 

(It was really hard to concentrate on the right mattress after that.)

 

Zach promptly forgot all about the situation up until the mattress company called on one of his rare days off to say that his mattress was waiting for him downstairs.

 

He put in a pair of pants and flew down the stairs, still in his slippers, only to be confronted with a monster blocking out all the light from the building’s entryway. The delivery men gave him and his slippers weird looks, but they point blank refused to help him move the mattress up to the apartment. It wasn’t in their job description apparently.

 

“Good luck,” one of the men tells him, and then they drive away. Zach appreciates the sentiment.

 

He enlists the help of the building’s doorman to drag the mattress inside, so at least it’s not sitting on the sidewalk, but Joe is sixty and Zach doesn’t want to ask him to exert himself. 

 

He rolls his phone in his hands, trying to figure out who to call. The obvious answer is Auston - he lives upstairs and he always helps Zach out when he needs it. But Auston is really bad at answering his phone. He always has it on silent and he returns calls a few days after you originally call him. So Zach calls Mitch instead.

 

“Zaaach,” Mitch always sounds so happy Zach called, like he hasn’t seen him in months instead of just one day, “what’s up?”

 

“Can you come help me with something?” Zach asks. “I’m stuck with a mattress and I can’t set it up alone.”

 

“Is that a pick-up line?” Mitch says, sounding curious.

 

“No!” Zach says, flushing, “I just need-”

 

But Mitch is already laughing. “I got you,” he says, “be there soon.”

 

Zach listens to the dial tone and waits for his embarrassment to die down before calling Auston. He waits for a long time, listening to the phone ring, and when he’s just about to end the call, Auston answers.

 

“What?” Auston asks in lieu of hello, and the tone of it is so uncharacteristically biting that Zach immediately starts apologizing.

 

“Sorry, is this a bad time?”

 

“No,” Auston takes a deep breath and it gusts out staticy over the phone, “it’s okay. I can talk.”

 

“I wanted to ask for your help moving a mattress, but if you’re busy...”

 

“I’m not,” Auston says, his voice softening, “I can come help. No problem.”

 

“Okay, good,” Zach tries to regain his bearings, “are you upstairs?”

 

“I’m out,” Auston says, “but I can be there soon.”

 

“I already called Mitch, and he’s on his way too.”

 

“I know, we’re together,”  _ oh, _ “we’ll be about ten minutes.”

 

Oh, shit. “Did I interrupt something?” Zach asks, carefully.

 

“No,” Auston says, his voice back to his low, warm cadence, “sit tight, okay? We’re on our way.”

 

Zach sits down, because that’s all he can really do. It certainly sounds like he interrupted something, and it’s actually mortifying. 

 

The reason his chest hurts is probably because he strained it while pushing the mattress into the building. He should get that checked out with the team doctors tomorrow.

 

He’s so zoned out that he barely notices them come in until they’re standing above him. 

 

“Dude,” Mitch says, interrupting Zach’s thoughts, “that’s a big mattress.”

 

Zach scrambles to his feet, and taken off guard by their sudden appearance, he starts to ramble. “It’s a monster! It barely fit through the front door, I don’t know how it’s going to get inside the apartment. I can lift it, but it’s so clumsy, and I...couldn’t think of anyone else to call.”

 

And it’s true, he realizes, looking at them. He could have called his brothers, or his dad, or even Brownie, who lives down the road, but instead his first reaction to a situation beyond his control had been to call Auston and Mitch, though they were arguably even less equipped to deal with it than he was. And he interrupted what was probably a date for it.

 

“I’m sorry,” Zach says, suddenly horrified, “I should have called a moving company-”

 

“It’s cool, we got this,” Mitch says, already testing the weight of one of the corners. Zach looks over at Auston, looking for some sort of help.

 

Auston is watching him instead of the mattress. Their eyes meet, Zach’s panic versus Auston’s calm. “It’s okay that you called us,” Auston says, quietly, and Zach nods, torn between embarrassed and grateful. 

 

By the time he looks back at the mattress, Mitch has already carted the whole thing onto his back. “Come on!” he yells, and Zach forgets every other feeling except fear, because the mattress is pulling dangerously on the wooden edge of the door to the staircase.

 

With Auston’s help, they eventually get Mitch to relinquish some of the mattress, and they carry it upwards together. Auston is up front, and he looks almost disturbingly cheerful about it, yelling out, “Pivot! Pivot!” every few feet.

 

“Why is he quoting Friends?” Zach asks through gritted teeth. He’s in the middle, and it’s the most precarious position when they’re going around corners.

 

“It’s a first overall thing,” Mitch tells him, muffled behind the mattress. “Davo does it a lot.”

 

Zach is spared from pondering over another nugget of McDavid weirdness, because they run into an old lady coming down the stairs, and he has to figure out the logistics of moving the mattress around her. She doesn’t trust elevators, she says, eyeing them suspiciously in a way that makes him feel like she doesn’t trust the three of them much either.

 

By the time they get the mattress up to Zach’s apartment, through the door and into the bedframe, the afternoon has sunk into evening. 

 

Zach makes the bed, with the only linen he’s got that fit the size of the mattress, and then he dresses a host of pillows too, because standing empty like that, the bed looks very big and very lonely. The bedding was washed by his mom at their family home and it smells fresh, like familiar detergent. He can never get it smelling like that at the apartment, even if he uses the same brand.

 

“It smells nice,” Auston says, right before face planting into the bed with a big sigh. After a moment, Mitch races past Zach to jump onto the other side, bouncing up and down.

 

“It’s really comfy!” he says, grinning up at Zach innocently. Zach sighs. At least they took off their shoes in the hallway. “Come on, try it!”

 

Mitch pats the space in the middle between him and Auston, and Zach stares at it blankly for a second. “Oh,” he says, “I don’t know.”

 

“It’s your bed, dude,” Mitch says.

 

_ ‘But you’re in it now,’ _ Zach thinks, but doesn’t say. Instead, he obediently sits at the edge of the bed, and crawls over to the space Mitch pointed out for him, settling on a pillow.

 

“It really is comfortable,” he says after a few minutes, staring up at the ceiling, as if that’ll stop him from acknowledging the slim distance between their three bodies, even with the big bed.

 

“Told you,” Mitch says, smugly, “look at Matts, he’s asleep.”

 

Zach looks, and Auston really is asleep, face planted into a pillow in a way that looks uncomfortable, his breathing deep and even.

 

“Oh,” Zach says, for lack of anything else.

 

“It’s about time for pre-game naps, right?” Mitch says, casually stretching along the bed. It brings his arm in contact with Zach and he leaves it there. “My body’s so used to downtime about now that I always end up feeling sleepy.”

 

And as Zach watches from the corner of his eye, trying to pick the right words from the jumble in his head, Mitch curls up around another pillow, and closes his eyes.

 

It’s late afternoon, almost evening. It’s been a clear sunny day, and the sunset is like that too, creeping through the uncovered window, painting the walls in pinks and oranges. Zach turns his head towards Auston, who’s still sleeping peacefully, his eyelashes fanning across his cheeks. He turns back to Mitch, watches his features slackened in sleep, waits for an explanation. 

 

Doesn’t get any.

 

If he were standing, he’d be dizzy with it, their proximity and their profiles softened by the sunset. Instead, he’s lying between them, and he’s comfortable, and warm, and the wisest course of action seems to be to close his eyes too.

  
  


*

  
  


Zach wakes up disoriented. It’s grown dark in the meantime, and the only light in the room is the faint shine of the streetlights through the window and the dim light from the hallway. He can just about make out Mitch’s features, slack in sleep. Auston is gone.

 

Zach sits up, and rubs at his eyes. His clothes feel too warm and damp with sweat, so he gets up to quietly rummage through a closet for another shirt, then shuffles out the door and down the hallway.

 

The light is coming from the living room and Zach blinks at it for a moment, waiting for his eyes to adjust. 

 

Auston is on the couch, curled up in a blanket and reading a book, and the sight of him fills Zach with so much fondness, it overwhelms him. He must make some sort of noise, because Auston looks up and smiles.

 

“Hey,” he says, and Zach nods, swallows heavily.

 

“What are you reading?” Zach asks, and Auston holds up the book. It’s ‘Bambino and Me’, and Zach flushes.

 

“I got a few complimentary copies,” Zach says, hurriedly. He doesn’t want Auston to think he’s the type of person who puts his own books on display.

 

Auston lowers the book and tucks it against his chest. “I tried to find it in the bookstore,” he says, “but they sold out after the season started.”

 

“Why were you looking for it?” Zach asks, moving to the kitchen area, at a loss for anywhere else to put himself.

 

“Because I wanted to read it,” Auston says, looking at Zach like he’s dumb.

 

“But why?” Zach asks. He expects a chirp, or at least a rebuke for being too nosy. He doesn’t get that.

 

“Because I want to support you in anything you like to do,” Auston says, calmly, and so sincerely, like they’re the kind of friends who say things like that casually.

 

“O-oh,” Zach stutters. He takes a glass from the cupboard, filling it with water, biding time, even if he isn’t sure what he’s waiting for. He chances a look at Auston over the rim of his glass. He’s looking back, and Zach averts his eyes again.

 

It’s ridiculous. He’s being ridiculous. He’s 24 years old, with a college degree, and this teenager has him flustered and tripping over himself just by looking at him. Zach thinks about Mitch, asleep in his bed, and flushes. 

 

It’s like a puberty renaissance. 

 

Auston takes a deep breath, audible in the quiet. “Mitch and I were talking and-” he starts.

 

“Are you starting without me?” Mitch breaks in, from where he’s standing at the end of the hallway. He’s changed into one of Zach’s old shirts, and it hangs loosely off his frame. Zach hurriedly turns around to get another glass and fill it with water. He hands it to Mitch, who takes it with a smile.

 

Auston shakes his head. “I didn’t know how long you’d be sleeping.”

 

“The bed is so comfy, we should nap here more often,” Mitch says, settles on the armrest of the couch. “Okay, now we can talk.”

 

They both look at Zach expectantly, and he freezes.

 

“What do we have to talk about?” he asks, carefully, immediately picturing the worst case scenario.

 

“Well,” Mitch starts, “I did some research on what you said at the party, about polyamory.” He says it weirdly, like he’s not used to the shape of vowels in his mouth, and looks at Zach expectantly.

 

“Okay,” Zach says, frantically searching his memory for the moment.

 

“I found this book called More Than Two: A Practical Guide to Ethical Polyamory-”

 

“That’s a great book!” Zach cuts in, his love of academia briefly cutting through his nerves.

 

Mitch beams. “Oh, you know it! That’ll make things much easier,” he says. “So, Auston and I talked about it and we decided that the kind of relationship we both want most is a non-hierarchical triad.”

 

“You,” Zach starts, stops, tries again. “What?”

 

“We’ve done a lot of thinking,” Mitch says, slowly, looking worried, “and we decided that polyamory is something that we both find acceptable.”

 

“Uh,” Zach says. His brain power feels just like one long siren noise.

 

“We even did the questionnaire that the book recommends,” Mitch says.

 

“Questionnaire?”

 

“Yeah, hold on, let me read it to you,” Mitch whips out his phone and starts scrolling. Zach exchanges a look with Auston, finds him apparently unbothered, the only sight of his nerves in the way he’s clutching the book to his chest, white-knuckled. Strangely, that makes a knot in Zach’s chest loosen a little.

 

“Okay, here it is,” Mitch says, then reads from his phone. “It’s called, ‘Is poly for you?’.”

 

He looks up at Zach expectantly, and for lack of any other response, he nods.

 

“Okay, so, the first one is: ‘Have I ever felt romantic love for more than one person at the same time?’” Mitch reads.

 

Zach looks between him and Auston, sitting on the couch, and swallows heavily.

 

Mitch keeps reading. “‘Do I feel there can only be one ‘true’ love or one ‘real’ soulmate?’”

 

If anyone is to be soulmates, it would be Mitch and Auston. They’re the ones who met and clicked immediately. They’re the franchise’s poster boys. Zach has no place in that, and the hope in his chest has no business growing stronger.

 

“This one is a mouthful,” Mitch says, “‘What do I want from my romantic life? Am I open to multiple sexual relationships, romantic relationships, or both?’”

 

In a flash, Zach remembers how they’d looked in his bed, how warm and comforting it was to have them there, to have them close. If there were less clothes involved, he wouldn’t be objecting. The contrary actually. 

 

Zach tries not to look, in the locker room, but-

 

“‘If I want more than one lover, what degree of closeness and intimacy do I expect, and what do I offer?’”

 

That’s the clincher isn’t it. Zach isn’t sure if what he has to offer really warrants the risk that Mitch and Auston would be taking. There are candidates lining up round the street, Zach has no illusions that he’d win any prizes.

 

“‘How important is transparency to me? If I have more than one lover, am I happy with them knowing about each other? If they have other lovers, am I happy knowing them?’” Mitch pauses, looks up and says, “I figured we could be exclusive at first, explore other options later?”

 

“I know I’m bad at communicating,” Auston says, quietly, “but I’ll try for you guys.”

 

Zach nods again, numbly. The knot in his throat is loosening, hope growing as realization settles in. 

 

Mitch goes back to reading. “‘If I am already in a relationship, does my desire from others come from a dissatisfaction or unhappiness with my current relationship?’” He flushes a little, doesn’t look away from his phone. “Auston and I, we didn’t...ah...we decided that we wanted to wait for you.”

 

“It wouldn’t have felt right,” Auston adds.

 

“‘How do I define commitment? Is it possible for me to commit to more than one person at a time, and if so, what would those commitments look like?’” Mitch takes a deep breath, and looks up. “I want to commit to you two.”

 

“Me too,” Auston says, “and I think it’ll only work if it’s all three of us.”

 

There’s stubbornness in the line of his mouth, like he expects an argument and Zach’s chest is so full it feels like it’ll burst.

 

“All three of us,” Zach repeats, softly, and he barely recognizes his voice. “Non-hierarchical?”

 

“Everyone is everyone’s first priority,” Mitch says, then makes a face. “You know what I mean.”

 

They’re both looking at Zach expectantly. Mitch puts away his phone and smooths his palms over his jeans. Auston’s leaned forward in his seat, chewing on his lips.

 

Silence. 

 

Zach sets his glass on the counter with a muted thump and hears Mitch’s breath catch. 

 

“Okay,” Zach says, can’t help smiling at their anxious faces.

 

“Wait,” Mitch says, making a face, “just like that?”

 

“You did your research,” Zach says, simply, “and there was no way I was going to say no.”

 

And it’s true. Somewhere between the start of the season and now, they got a hold on him and there had been no way for him to get away. He rocks forward onto his feet, walks around the kitchen counter, and to Mitch, because he’s closest.

 

The angle is awkward. Zach is standing up and Mitch is up on the sofa arm, but when Zach reaches down with shaking fingers to tip his head up that doesn’t seem to matter. Their kiss is sweet, and everything Zach didn’t even know he was imagining. 

 

He feels movement at his side, and Mitch gasps into the kiss, so Zach reaches out blindly for Auston, lets him twine their fingers together. 

 

Eventually, Zach backs away, breathing deeply. Mitch’s mouth is flushed red and shining. He looks over at Auston and then can’t look away. He’s biting at his lips, looking between them, and his eyes seem huge and dark in the dim lamp light.

 

“Go on,” Mitch breaks the silence, laughing a little, “kiss him!”

 

The angle is still awful, with Auston sitting on the sofa, so Zach folds his legs and kneels. Mitch and Auston breathe identical sharp gasps and Zach grins, flattered. But it’s easier to reach Auston from there, easier to press their lips together, kiss that slack-jawed expression off his face.

 

Zach pulls back and Mitch is there to take over, kissing Auston with less sweetness than he’d shown to Zach. It’s a hell of a show, and Zach watches, feeling a little like the world is spinning. Auston’s fingers tighten around his, and Zach braces on Mitch’s knee with his other hand, feeling more tethered by their combined body heat.

 

Mitch breaks the kiss, laughing a little bit. “This was the best idea I’ve ever had,” he declares.

 

“Hey,” Auston frowns a little, “it wasn’t just your idea.”

 

Mitch makes a face at him and it makes Zach laugh. “You’ve only been in this relationship for a couple of minutes and you’re already arguing,” he says.

 

“That’s why we need you,” Mitch says, innocently.

 

“The voice of reason,” Auston adds, leans forward to press a kiss to Zach’s cheek. And it’s a good thing that Mitch kisses him right after, because Zach is absolutely having some very sappy thoughts right now.

  
  


*

  
  


“So, I guess you’ll be coaching us through a threesome after all?”

 

“With all the porn you’ve watched for ‘research’, I think you’re probably the expert.”

 

“Zach, your elbow is in my kidney.”

 

“Oh, sorry.”

  
  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Notes:  
> \- polyamory vocabulary:  
> * triad - a relationship involving three people  
> *hierarchical relationship - presumes that one relationship is the primary relationship, with secondary partner  
> \- Dylan Larkin and Zach both played for the University of Michigan  
> \- I made up Zach's living situation. Presumably he still loves with his family in Toronto, but Auston does live with his dad  
> \- there are 36 mattress stores in the wider Toronto area and I'm a lying liar who lies  
> \- [and article](https://www.nhl.com/news/maple-leafs-zach-hyman-authors-childrens-books/c-284605482) about Zach's career as a children's book author. Both Bambino and Me, and Hockey Hero can be bought on amazon.  
> \- More Than Two: A Practical Guide to Ethical Polyamory is a real book, written by Franklin Veaux. It also has an associated website called [More than Two](https://www.morethantwo.com/). Both the book and the website are excellent resources for anyone interested in learning more about poly. The questionnaire we used in this fic is also taken directly from the book.

**Author's Note:**

> End notes from us:
> 
> If you enjoyed reading or listening to this story then you might enjoy listening to the creator's freetalk on the chapter 1 podfic page or reading a transcript of it [here](https://docs.google.com/document/d/1JXAMRZWgWp6NCDisghZ9uHy51QdUHyBnV3P_l6lKjYo/edit?usp=drivesdk), where both of us talk about the story and the collaboration process. 
> 
> We hope you enjoyed our self-indulgent project! Kudos and comments of any length, about the text or podfic, are hugely appreciated. 
> 
> We are both very keen to discuss Zach Hyman, niche Leafs ships, and poly topics at the slightest excuse, so please feel free to ask or speculate about anything!


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